Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Jesus.Bible bashers.Laying on of hands.Stop it.



Ok. Cough.

I went to the bizarre place that is The Crap Pub and met another student who knew more about me than myself it seemed. This was probably because the times that she met me before was at Da Shack when I was inebriated with my choice tipple..Wray & Nephew (for those who don't know).

I thought I was in with a chance at first because she is a babe and was drunk in a nice way and very receptive to me but then I found out the road we were travelling on was (cough again), slightly different..

She is 24. Has a boyfriend, that she quickly introduced me to. Kev.

I am very wary of anybody called Kev. Or Tracey. Or Sharon for that matter. But I digress.

When I asked where they met, I was sent on a round the world trip of guesses that did me wrong.

In the end I had to look at their necks as a clue.

Of course this is normal no?

Two big glaring mothers of a cross were staring right at me. Winking even.

You see, this kind of behaviour has to stop.

When I saw this and understood where they met, I turned into the Wray & Nephew Anti Christ Mad Bird.(no hyperlink found in Google there, sorry). She is kinda intense. Scary even.

I did the right thing and said I'm not bothered.(to avoid a grand debate/discussion). You do your thing and I will not comment.

I said.

But.

Them crosses kept glaring and glinting at me. I became more and more agitated in The Ole Crap Pub.

This is not what you need really when you are out celebrating not having to work in the goddamn sweetie shop at the weekend anymore because you have somehow got a life again. Is it?

So. What did I do?

I ranted. I raved.

I did it some more.

You know what she did right in the middle of a rant?

Said "Sorry but I hope you don't mind..' and then layed her hands on me and started saying 'in the name of the Father, The Blah and The Blah di Blah..save this c.u.n blah" or words to that effect.

Tried to save me. Tried to save me??!!!

No dot ever dot way dot

I feel like I have been cursed. Fiddled with. Whatever.

I definitely feel filthy.

People who do that kind of thing should actually stop.

Or is it just me and I should feel in some way blessed?

Personally....I think.....

How very dare you!

3 comments:

SteveLockwood said...

So I could buy myself a big cross and put it round my neck and then I could go around putting my hands on young ladies to "save them"?

The idea is appealing but I wonder how many people I could "save" before I got arrested or kicked in the balls.

No wonder you feel fiddled with.

Stef said...

That's nuts...

Happybutterfly said...

I know, and I still feel dirty or fiddled with to this day! What's that about??