I am bisexual not lesbian.

Oooh. How to wind a girl up. A fiercely bisexual one at that.

How many times have I had to state that I am not gay?

That a bisexual identity does exist.

No really.

A friend of mine said to me last night that she didn't know that I 'did' girls. I have told her many times (maybe when she was completely blotto but that is beside the point). She has remembered nothing.

So deja vu struck again and her sign off comment was "I'm going to have to go now my lesbo friend'.

Lesbo?

God.

At least come up with a bisexual derogatory phrase! Please.

Armed robbery at the end of the road.

What other lovely things are in store for my area I wonder.

Country going down hill. Check.

Country reached rock bottom yet? Getting there fast.

If you were to check the archives of this blog you would spot that there has been

• 2 murders
• 2 stabbings
• plenty drug dealing

and the recurring feeling that I have chosen to live in the new Brixton-by-Sea.

Time to move on methinks?

Oompa's back. Is this a mistake?

Ok. So she is back. By default.

I was minding my own business today in the chicken shop:-) Then she wobbles past. I Hail her like a taxi cab and she breaks. Sharply. My food arrives and we walk back to mine.

She tells me about all these ridiculously mental girls that she has 'loved' and lost in the space of a breath.

She questions why I am no longer her friend on Facebook. Why she is asking me I don't know because she has deleted me at some point (am I bothered? No really, am I bothered?.

Now we are going to be friends again on Facebook (ahhhhh).

She is now single.

She is coming round again on Thursday so she says.

She better not have any funny ideas.

No alcohol will be consumed on that day in her presence.

I herby declare........

Not after last time...